On Lying

Yesterday I received the phone bill and found out there were 24 calls made to an unfamiliar cellphone number. Though it is more than the usual amount, I did not find the total amount outrageous. However, it was the lack of courtesy to inform me that they had to use the phone that would cost more than the local calls that surprised me. Worse, when I asked who made the calls, everyone in the house denied it.  I checked the dates and times when the calls were made and I immediately recalled the number of times I saw our helper use the phones on those specific times. I tried to ask them once again, I got the same answer. So the little surprise that I had turned into disgust. I hate it when people lie. And so I did what I usually do whenever I'm sure someone's lying. As usual I succeeded. How I did it I don't need to elaborate because it's quite easy actually and doesn't need too much effort. It's the "how to make him admit" that I knew would not be easy or well, I thought wouldn't be easy.

This afternoon I did not consume myself on the lying incident anymore because I wanted my Sunday to be a relaxed one. Although of course, the "sutil"/mischievous person in me still injected sarcasm on the topic probably once or twice. It was during dinner that my mom opened the topic again, and like mother like daughter, she did the "panunutil" that time. Lo and behold! The culprit finally spoke. To his surprise, we didn't get mad. We just lectured him a little and just made fun of him. It all ended with a good laugh. Amidst all these, not even once did I feel anger. Yes he lied and it's bad but I've seen and heard worse. And I think I've even met the boy who cried wolf not just once. The one thing that made it lighter is the fact that out helper finally admitted his fault.

You see, lying is a basic human nature, I heard that somewhere. Who's not guilty of it? However, it is the reason, gravity and frequency that should be noted. Here's the thing, we lie to avoid conflict among people, we tell people with low self-esteem they look fine but in truth you don't really like his outfit, that's fine. But to lie just to save one's face? I find that abhorring especially when you already have all the pieces of evidence, laid the cards and still hear a vehement denial. Some people say they don't lie, they just edit or leave out stories. Does it really make a difference? I don't think so. If you're guilty, face the consequences and that's it. If it means prison terms, talk to your lawyer, but that's a different story. But believe it or not, it is that simple.

As for our helper, I've forgiven him even if i have to pay a couple of hundreds more for this month's bill. I'm just happy that he had the courage to tell the truth. It's the honesty that actually made the big difference. (Trust me, honesty will make everything simpler).

(Written February 22, 2009 -  from my Friendster blog)